What a weekend!!!!!!!!!!!!

Friday 5th September, time to collect the bike from Southampton, so loaded with spare parts off I trot to Ronaldsway airport for my flight. Flight at 1200hrs, must get to the port by 1700hrs as the office closes then till Monday.

Weather atrocious, heavy, heavy rain - flight put back 4 times. Finally take off at 1730hrs (port office closed). Get to Southampton at 1820hrs, still raining, and as port office is closed and I will have to return on Monday, I catch a train to Birmingham in order to spend the weekend with my family. Train fare £106.00 return. GULP!!

Have a great weekend, parents anniversary and granddaughters 2nd birthday, so not all bad.

Up at the crack of dawn on Monday and catch train back to Southampton. Pay my money at the office and go to see bike. Boy, has she got dirty whilst she has been on the boat, covered in dust, still, we are re-united.

Get to work and fit new regulator and generator windings, press the starter and the battery is dead. Try jump starting her, she fires up, take of the jump start and she dies. Call RAC man!!!

He comes out and checks battery and tells me that the battery is not holding amps - new battery required. Question - was this the problem all the time, and I have I wasted £200 on rectifier and windings? I don't know but suspect that is so. Bugger!

It is now 1730hrs on Monday, and the RAC man runs me to a Honda dealer to get a battery - dealer does not have one - more bugger.

The upshot of this is that the RAC have now got to arrange a full recovery for me and the bike from Southampton to home on the Isle of Man, all for the sake of a battery.

I was originally booked on the 1800hrs ferry from Liverpool, but due to the problem I have changed the sailing to the 0215hrs from Heysham, so the recovery has till 0130hrs to get me up there

Recovery turn up and onto the truck goes Blackie, and off we go, getting to Heysham at 0100hrs - no problem, and onto the boat we go. Give the RAC a quick call just to let them now that I will arrive at Douglas at 0545hrs and they say a recovery vehicle will be waiting.

Arrive Douglas as expected, and guess what - no recovery!!!! More phone calls, will be a 2 hour wait as the message was not passed on! Decide to forgo recovery and go home to bed and collect bike at lunchtime after buying a battery.

Got up and purchased battery from the local dealer, back to port and fitted same, pressed starter - she lives!!!!!!!

Start to ride home, and get taken off buy a myopic idiot in a car doing a U turn to get to a parking space. I find myself sliding across the tarmac and tram lines on my head, shoulder and hip whilst the bike slides along on its side propped up on the panniers. "Sorry, didn't see you" says the driver, blaming a blind spot in his mirrors.

The upshot of all this is that I am now waiting to have the bike examined by the insurance company to see if it is repairable (hope it is as I was selling it to my mate) and I am left with whiplash, stiff shoulders and a grazed, bruised and swollen hip.

How do I do 8000 miles across America and 0.2 miles back on the Isle of Man? Answers on a postcard please.